This blog will be furthered on MY BLOGGER ACCOUNT .
Go ahead, peek at it.
I don’t know if I would continue writing on this blog, the future bears no witness.
Thank you and continue to read me on my blogger.
Now scram!
FOREWORD:
If death came in bad news, then I’m a rotten corpse buried six feet below the ground with a forgotten tomb by now. I supposedly conjure blog blabs if a special event happened or if it’s harvest time for the sweet succulent fruits in the futile farm of my brain. And this entry is a combo of both, until harvest was too late and special events lead to a morning of stupid alibis and a spoonful of my mom’s bratatat of words.
This is my ghost reaching out to you, hi-tech style.
***
ALPHABET MASTERY LEVEL 2: A HOMAGE
As we accumulate age, accepting arduous activities is an aspect that anchors accurate analysis with aching anxiety at the actual time. Blinded by this baffling buzz, we basically bask ourselves to benign bases, that, by and by bullies us to the bushes and beats us by the belly. We consequently choose churning our chances and charring our charisma that our character cusps. Denying duty is a disgrace. Everything ends and eventually we must extract and embrace its essence even if elucidates an evolution equivalent to eras extinct. In this feat, I feel, a Fahrenheit in high fences must be fastened in order to fetch many facets that falls farther forward to face fantods with frown faltered. The gapping galaxy is a grand gateway to grabbing gargantuous getaways that we should be gorging in it. But heaps of happenings in a human harbors haunt in our heads and hearts. Inevitable it may appear, but indigestion of information can be intended as ideal by illegitimating immense imperative intuitions. And by justifying our jigs and jogs judiciously and not jocosely. It is key not just kibosh. Its also a lordly lesson to learn that living lavishly is as lowly as lending in lust. Minimizing on our miscellaneous matters may maximize meaningful merits and misery may be missed out more. Not taking in negativities is also a note-worthy notion. Its oblivious how open we are to oppression of others but to oblige ourselves to oblation is an obscurity. It is in our palms to make pact of peace and place pride in the past; this is a paragon. This qualification, if not done quaintly would only bring us to qualm. Resentment to a rude routine rests in a rank and file reason that seem rational, but would reek in a radical rate to some. Seeking out solutions to our sentiments should solidify sanctions of solidarity. The time has tendered that we take tedious tactics to take down troubled times. Ultimately, we must understand this undertakings from the ulterior to the umteenth or unboundedness of the usual upsetting. Virtues are of vast value to veer the veins of vehement but venial vices. Wasting wagers over wrongful wars would only want us to wash everything up. Don’t be xenophobic. Yond not on yester actions but yelp on the young that yokes the yearning of years. To zizz is to zig in the zealous zest of life.
***
SHET! MAHAL PA RIN KITA!
Bubot pa ako at hilaw sa pakikisama, tinuruan mo kong makipaghalubilo, makipagkulitan, magmahal at maging tao. Hindi ka naiiba sa karamihan nang unang pagsasama natin, aminado naman ako na nalaman ko lang ang bigat ng dating mo sa akin nung nawala ka. Higit kitang minahal nung wala ka na.
Mahigit tatlong taon ang inilagak mo sa piling ko, akalain mo iyon, TATLONG TAON! Halos di ko na namalayan, masayang masaya at kontento na kasi ako sa’yo. Wala na kong hinihingi pang iba, sabi ko pa nga sa sarili ko, hinding hindi kita papalitan. Tatlong taong pakikibaka sa relasyon, tatlong taon na nandiyan ka para lamang sa akin, tatlong taong tawanan, iyakan, harutan at kung ano-ano pa na ginawa nating dalawa, oo, nating dalawa lamang. Tatlong taon yon, akalain mo.
Nasanay na rin siguro ako sa’yo madalas tinotopak ka, asar na asar talaga ko sa’yo sa mga ganung panahon. Pasensya na kung lahat ng mura ay nasambulat ko na sa iyo. Tao lang ako, at alam kong hindi mo naman talaga kasalanan kapag di mo nagagampanan ang sumpa mo sa akin. Madalas rin naman akong may pagkukulang sa iyo, may mga panahon na hindi kita pinapansin, hindi napupunan ng atensyon at aruga. Patawad na. At alam kong sa huli, ako ang may kagagawan sa paghihiwalay natin. Muli, patawad.
Siguro nga may nakatagpo ka ng iba. Nung huli kong pagpaparamdam sa iyo, hindi na kita naabot. Nasaan ka na kaya? Sana hindi ka niya pinabayaan. Kung ganun lang rin, ibalik ka na lang niya sa akin. Ipaparanas ko sa iyo ang importansyang dapat mong tinatamasa.
Hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko nung nawala ka…
…pero sa ngayon, napalitan na kita.
***
HINDI LANG BAGANSYA ANG TULOY
Sa lahat lahat sa buhay ko, pinaka nagpapasalamat ako sa IYO!*
* IYO - tao na tumukukoy sa sino mang nakasama ko [jazz rosende]. E.g. pamilya, kabigan, kaklase, kalandian, jowa, nakasabay sa jeep/bus/fx/tricycle**, nakahingahan***, guro/propesor, crush na hindi niya alam na pinagnanasahan ko siya, mga nanunukso sa akin, mga panakaw at hindi panakaw tumingin sa daan tuwing nakalagpas na ako sa kanya, sa lalakeng nagyakult**** sa tabi ng bus na sinasakyan ko, sa mga pulubing nakagiliwan kong pagtripan, sa mga baby na lagi kong tinititigan at pinanggigigilan, sa mga baby na pinipicturan ko di ko naman kilala, nagaabot ng bayad sa jeep, nagpaputok ng hangin sa pwet at itinaas ang kili kili sa muka ko, sa mga nahawaan at hinawaan ko ng ano mang virus o bacteria, sa manikyurista namin, sa aso ko, sa sino mang nakasama ko sa isang moment ng buhay ko. Inaacknowledge kita at binuo mo ang pixelated kong buhay.
** dahil kung hindi ka dumating hindi napuno ang sinasakyan ko at naloka kakahitay yung driver.
*** dahil tulad ko, fan ka rin ng oxygen at polusyong bonus (?) nito.
**** explicit content, berde!
Katumbas nito ang labing walong taong hindi ninyo ako piagdamutan ng pakikisama. Utang ko sa inyo kung ano ako ngayon. Wag ka na lang sanang magpatubo.
***
EPILOGUE:
ang bahagi pagkatapos ng foreword ay pagpapahalaga ko sa mga letra, walang nilimbag na salita kung walang simbolo kung tawagin ay letra. Sinisimbolo rin nito na sa isang simpleng tao makakabuo ng isang tagpo, pangyayari, kwento o kasaysayan kasama ang ibang simpleng tao rin. Dahil sa inyo, binuo ninyo ang kasaysayan ko.
pangalawang bahagi nagpapahalaga naman sa SIM card ko. RIP! [nawala kasi cellphone ko e, pero may bago na kong number]
pangatlo, nagpapasikat lang ako sa inyo.
Pagkauwi ko, hindi ako makatulog kaya naglaro muna ko ng PSP. Walang pinatunguhan, YOU LOSE daw.
Makunat na dahon ang salit-salitang
sumasahimpapawid kasama ng nagpupuyos na galamay ng araw na tumutusok sa balat.
Ginigisa ang lahat ng biniyayaan ng kulay at sinunog hanggang maging
kulay-kaki. Pag-tingin sa malayo, pagewang-gewang na daan ang ilusyon ng
hanging isinumpa, tila tunaw ang mga kalsadang pinagkaitan ng suki. Binabarat
sa ulap ang panahon na tila nagsumiksik sa kung saang sulok ng mundo na malayo
dito. Masungit ang araw at parurusahan niya ang pagliliwaliw sa daan. Malungkot
naman ang mga isda dahil tila pinapakuluan ang languyan nila, at maging pagluha
nila ay hindi sapat upang mapunan ang mabubuting tubig na maagang pinaakyat sa
langit. Kasabay sa pagiyak ng mga isda ay ang pagtatampuhan ng lupa. Hiwa-hiwalay
at bitak-bitak sila, nandidiri sa isa’t-isa at ayaw magtabi. Nagmumukhang palad
sa dami ng linyang nagpapaekis-ekis. Tiklop na ang mga bulaklak na
bumubungisngis lamang sa kiliti ng matamis na hangin ng Disyembre, nakatiklop
na rin ang mga aspaltong palad. Nananawagan na ang mga manang at manong na matunaw
na ang mga ulap na tila suso kung gumapang sa kaasulan ng langit. Nanlilimahid
ang mga balat at hinahapo ang mga dila sa kalalawit, ngunit tuloy pa rin ang
panawagang pagtatanggol ng mga ulap sa pangaasar ng araw.
Ang mundo ay isang malaking pugon na
tumutusta sa mga halaman at nililiyaban ang mga puwit ng mga mamamayang
bumabaluktot sa latigo ng panahon. Ang maitim na gabi ang pumapatay sa hagupit
ng umaga, ngunit ramdam pa rin ang alab ng araw kahit na sa paghahari ng buwan.
Saklot tayo sa leeg ng araw at binubugahan pa ng maalinsangang usok mula sa bibig
nito. Tapos ay tinutuklap ang balat at ibinabaon ang mga kuko ng apoy sa ating
kalamnan. Nakakangiwi ang kasalukuyang kalagayan. Tayo’y inalisan ng
katiwasayan ng pakiramdam. Paos na ang konsensiya kakahiyaw sa langit ng
kaginhawaan. Labag man sa atin, ang pagtangkilik sa pangungutya ng araw ay
hindi matatakasan. Nilalamon tayo ng hindi makitang alab ng araw.
Haaaaaay, bakasyon nanaman.
faces have blushed red, boogers have turned green, and hearts, oh hearts drenched in bitterness swimming in streams of consciousness for the finish lines are marathons more to run soles and rolls of tissues come in command in the fates of the blues swinging voice shouting by the mega phone and dancing under the nasty toils of undercover plots by the higher ups wheat fields that once grew were trespassed by concrete and rooftops clever shepherds movie scripts and undone business calling cards left to open cans of sardines in tomato paste yes were all fishes in cans filled with blood the back of the hand it runs with greens and purples constant twitching and the guitar aches in pain for the unseen purpose of coming in between lovers of lost love and the foes that we once knew pointed the gun for solitude he said we all knew better i was just the pink thread wrapping timidness forever deemed by your demeaning causes swayed by the paper boats of youth the swoosh of the wind made me change my mind and no was restated several ways the french and the italian fought pointed nose against rubbish feet-pajamas sliding to the left, to the left is nowheres land open accuracy failed to deliver this time you pinned the combination wax lifted the bruises of my skin arriving here was your fault felt your velvet tounge between my crusted toes veins throbbed on your forehead you know im accessible of all people your the one who can pull the trigger and free as the bee in a saoilr hat and gloves tear me through the back yelled ahoy! ahoy! ahoy! the kid skidded down tic-toc mocked me the juices and dairies were sweet as your first crush on a boy across the mudded down play place the peak is yet to come and everything would be as it is when you wake up.
editor’s note:
inspired by the beatles.
Butil na ibinuga ng balat
Ang init, ang init na nagpupuyos
Naghahalinhinan ang hapdi at bawat tilamsik ng balat
sa pagsuyod sa nabubulok kong laman.
Pluk, pluuk…
Ang karera ng tunog at dampi.
Kinukusot ang balat kong inemprentahan ng yurak
Umaagos at kinakalong ang tuyong pighating nanuot sa bawat libag.
Pinupunan ng maligamgam na pag-asa.
Guguhit.
Hahalik sa paa.
Papatak sa kawalan.
Tatagos sa kinabukasan.
Editor’s note:
heres a treat, my first all filipino entry. Merry Christmas everyone 
batang lovestoned na nakapambatang pj’s ngayong pasko..
L-O-S-E-R!
Has the world gone hysterically mad? Britney’s on track with her new album, just recently the peso hit an all time high since 2000 as it landed 41php against a dollar, my pores are getting a tad bit smaller than what I used to nag about and guess who scored an HP laptop as an early Christmas gift *wink*. So okay maybe the world really is round as the voyage of Magellan proved to us so, does that mean that it is well rounded?
I have been spacing out on my life and the mileage has gone out in leagues. There is just nothing about me to be wild about. I haven’t been writing much, no recent artwork, no books to read, no new music to bop on, nothing! Puff! Gone… why does everything just keeps on bee-bopping in and out of my life? I know I don’t have much on the, uhh, hmm, “chest” department but sheesh I don’t look like a doormat! But why does everything seem to just walk all over, walk past and stomp all over me? I feel like everyone I know has something new up their sleeve and that I am always lagging behind. There are times that I think I can do a better job than some people but the feeling just swirls in my head, playing on me like a broken record, repeating itself only to remind me that laziness will overcome me again. Once again I am defeated.
I have always said to my self that my worst trait is being lazy, but why don’t I get lazy on being lazy? If you think about it, it kinda seems like my best trait is being lazy. Well, I hope not! But why did I have the urge to type this blah blah blah down? Maybe the inner [I mean way inside, embedded deep within] hard-working, inspired and winner me still lives on. Here I go again with the multiple personality shit. Just so you guys know, I think I am bi-polar. And no, its not the same as a freakin polar bear.
Im a loser who keeps on trying.
Maybe I should move to the north pole with other polar creatures.
~jazzy
A land of chrome
A valley of walls
A never ending rat race
A vast ocean of pure gray and black
You hold such exotic beauty
But tears of sorrow continues to flow through your face made
of asphalt
Your cemented fingers continue to reach for the core of the
sun
And yet dog feces are everywhere as if to say you’re still at
the bottom
Loudly, you here whispers of hatred and despise
Yet you strengthen your grounds like steel.
Steel that barricades you from the time long forgot
Your greatness runs through the greens and the browns
That you illuminate hope, bouncing from one glassed window to
the other
Scattering shreds of strength to those outside
Flames are burning in bright red,
Its heat radiates all over
And little moths that fly too close to you are left with
chard wings and broken dreams
Lucky are those who get to embrace your beauty from the time
of their beginning
For many aspire just to have a whip of the sweet aroma of
your stench
Your color is as filthy as smoke that you summon from the
mouths of your little minions
And yet you portray the vividness of a butterfly,
Soaring and spreading joy to everyone
You are on a pedestal towering over the others,
Laughing hysterically and forcing them,
Forcing them to dress like
the monochromatic-colorful you.
MANILIAR
this one of the rarerest occasions where i am
actually going to tell an actual event that happened in the actuality
of my life and actually narrate it on my actual blog, why you ask?
actually, its because I am really raving because i just saw Fall Out
Boy face to face, not blog worthy you say? well screw all haters
reading this! anyways, here’s the 411 on how September 21 2007 ranked
as the second happiest moment of my life
warning:
this is really long, so better fuel your body with caffeine and go for
the sweets to blast your self with a sweet body rush. BE WARNED!
Wednesday, September 19, 2007: i
was early for class today and the section using our room was still
there, few minutes later they came out when i was suddenly harassed
[he-he] by Camille, i asked her if she was going to watch the NCAA
finals later, and she said shes not, explaining further that she was
actually going to MOA to meet FOB live, in the flesh! to the news of
this, i immediately went ga-ga! so all plans i had that day got thrown
out the window just to make way for this meet-and-greet.
later that
afternoon, we came there, with a sign that says FOB was going to be
there September 19 but the number 19 was covered up by a paper with a
number 21.
no FOB that day, but I was still determined to chase them, if that was what i have to do to see them.
Friday, September 21, 2007: i
came to class really late so the thought of FOB is not yet on my mind.
after our class i didn’t know what to do, it frustrated me that i was
going to see FOB with no armaments of any kind, whatsoever [by armament
I mean a camera] our digicam is still broken, all the camera phones in
our house was being used and the only option i had was to use my
Motorola E398, the only problem is its charger was broken so i had to
scout the entirety of quaipo to look for a cheap but quite functional
charger. i ended up walking from quiapo to isetan just to buy a friggin
charger. tired, i headed back home and immediately charged my phone.
now that the camera issue is solved I’m now trying not to psyche myself
out on the thought of seeing FOB.
I still had a 1:30-3 class but i
decided to cut class just for the boys. i left home and the flow of
traffic is quite heavy due to the demonstrators on Mendiola, this day
they commemorated the anniversary of martial law but i was out to
commemorate some kids from Chicago.
arriving at MOA thats when it
hit me that i am going to see them. the crowd was already thick by then
[2:30] but i still managed to weave through and be quite close to the
stage. waiting for them i was annoyed by (1) this fat kid in front of
me who kept on wiggling and screaming, for the love of pickles your ass
is enough to fit the whole of MOA so stop moving damn it! (2) by these
two freakin konyo girls who are really stupid. talking with their
Californian accent and talking nonsense all the way to the moon and (3)
by the crowd who kept touching me, annoying as hell i tell you! i stood
anonymously in the crowd for a couple of hours and at last they came.
everyone was screaming but i wasn’t. why? i have my genes to blame this
time, WHY DO I HAVE TO BE SO SMALL!! coz of this, i only saw glimpses
of them damn it! heres a part of that glimpse that i saw, look!
red dude in the middle PETE WENTZ; guy in a hat and in blue is PATRICK STUMP!
all they did was sign autographs to the lucky
200 who came in really early and could afford the 700 price tag of
their Cd’s. after that they posed in each side of the stage and heres my
best shot of them
i
wasn’t satisfied with just being about two meters away from them, i was
willing to stalk them. [i know, my psycho hardcore fan is showing up
again] when they left everyone followed their trail but we [me and
rascal] went the opposite way, and we saw their getaway vehicle, the
two of us were the only ones there and then they popped out in front of
us.
heres the best part:
a meter away: i was calling them "Pete! Pete!" "pat! pat! pat! PATRIIIICK!"
five feet away: PATRICK STUMP LOOKED AT ME AND WAVED AT ME! [he waved at me..gaaaah!!!!]
a foot away: i
was too frozen [yes i actually stood frozen with a silly gaze at
Patrick for i was too mesmerized] to move and to even take a picture of
them when he was right there, face-to-face with the love of my life
PATRICK STUMP, i can actually reach Patrick if it wasn’t for the big
bouncer who whisked me away and made my time move again.
FOB was pass me: i was still screaming "PATRICK!! PATRICK!!" then i started to….
…cry. [I'm such a loser]
FOB now at their get away car: i was still teary eyed and still screaming for Patrick’s name when the crowd came, heres a shot of them leaving MOA
thats their getaway car..
my year has been quite unlucky, i got sick
frequently this year and other misfortunes concerning about love, life,
friendship, and everything in between. but this day proved otherwise.
FALL OUT BOY was my saving grace, that i can definitely declare! I’m so glad i skipped my last period for this…
There
are still more to tell about this once in a lifetime event, but I’m
afraid this entry is getting too long [and too boring] to continue. i
promise for a part 2.
and oh, i also saw the drummer of spongecola and the bassist of mojofly there
editor’s note:
please please please don’t
grab this photos, just find others on the Internet [which are totally
better than this] just not this okay?
credit goes to rascal for paying for my
transportation fees, taking these awesome photos, and for being my
master/guru on stalking [he-he]. this day wont be as great as it is if not
shared with you.
my wish on the peak of my under age-ness?
complete and utter obliteration of eager teenage boys who gets giddy, too fast too soon, on a lass who showed the oops-i-did-it-again symptoms to him. wake up boys, obviously your testosterone travels faster than your neurons.
do yourself a favor, go to a desert and go nuclear!
KABOOM!
…and another thing, i wish i can shove my stiletto heel up you ass to show you who has a deadlier, stiffer stick! tss…haha!
As i spend most of my summer vacation fighting boredom, doing nothing but nothing, i ask my best friend for help, television. {well technically my third best friend, first is my cellphone, then the computer and then TV.]
I sat, trying to find a sweet spot for my butt to make friends with and rampage around TV-landia, asking for mercy to give me something to drool on. I desperately need entertainment. So with this plea, my finger was possessed, rapidly pressing the soft rubbery buttons of the remote, i was entertained with this act of voodoo. But then what better way to counter any witchcraft than with the help of no, not with a chanting priest dousing holy water but with a good TV show. So the pressing stopped and i stumbled upon watching King Kong in HBO.
Not long ago, when this movie is about to premiere here, i was not at all interested with the plot of the movie, a chimp falling in love with a girl. i know, grossest thing ever, besides parents making out. The only thing that made me want to watch this movie is because it is directed by Peter Jackson., the geek [who looks like Hagrid from Harry Potter] behind the gay-est movie ever, lord of the rings, which is my favorite anyways. Trying to keep my food from defying gravity, i watched the movie from the beginning until the credits started rolling. What can i say desperation and boredom leads to monkey-enticed fantasies.
To my biggest surprise, this movie actually lead me to many sick and twisted ideas, which are:
1. Peter Jackson likes to play with the speed of the movie, he slows things down when the water-works is about to begin and hastens the film when heart racing scenes are shown. I got you all figured out, nerd!
2. Adrian Brody’s nose is so crooked, i wanted to enter the TV and give that nose a good pinching! the nose annoyed the hell out of me.
3. Most of the film’s script is grunting and moaning. King Kong must’ve been the head script writer. and what better way to end the film with a crappy, cheesiest one liner ever! Well done script writers!!
4. Naomi Watts is a beaver-looking goddess.
But what lead me to write an entry in my waste management program aka blog about a perverted monkey is [tantararan..] this:
5. People travel around, go out of their way to settle in a place and leave their comfort zone. You venture to the unfamiliar alone and hopefully makes it through the day. But when you meet someone amongst all the world anew, someone who disregards the differences that you share and makes you fill not a misfit but a unique creation, everything starts to feel familiar. You regain your comfort zone. You wouldn’t care about the trouble in front of you, or in the movie, you wouldn’t care if your in an unchartered island with dinosaurs as your neighbors who tries to eat you when king Kong is not looking. as long as your with a person eager to make things as safe as a home to you [or someone as freakishly monster-like as king Kong.] You will start to realize that everything will be okay. Much like what a family would make you feel, safe and protected. or like a condom.
I told you, sick and twisted ideas!hahahaha…
THIS ENTRY IS DEDICATED TO THE FAMILIES I HAVE IN MY LIFE:
BENETONS: you have taught me so much. I am truly blessed to have a foundation in my life as strong as what we share.
UPLB/ROOMMATES: you made me feel i belong.
MY BLOOD FAMILY: all of you is what comprises me. see you guys later! 
NUN: bliss…
